What is the common response you hear when someone gets an unexpected gift?
“Oh, you didn’t have to do that!”
When was the last time YOU said that?
Help can come in many forms: sometimes the help comes as a gift, money, compliments, or whenever someone wants to do something nice for you! Why is there so much guilt and shame behind accepting help? I have my thoughts about why, so let’s chat.
Back to our favorite line “Oh, no you didn’t have to do that!”
First, accepting help isn’t about anyone being obligated to help. Did we forget that someone doing something nice for another is a normal thing?
Some of you turn help away because you don’t want to appear weak. News Flash: Accepting help does not take away your power.
Some of you turn away help because you have trust issues. You’re thinking that if you let someone help you or do something nice for you, they have an evil, manipulative motive. You have this idea that they are only helping you because they are going to hold it over your head one day! If that’s you, cut ties with your trust issues so you can accept that someone wants to do something nice for YOU!
This one may sting a little bit. Some of you turn away help because you have a self-worth problem. This can easily turn into a self-sabotage habit. For only reasons you know, you feel you don’t deserve it. This takes some down and dirty work to address those reasons.
“Listen”, accepting help doesn’t mean that you are demanding help from anyone. It doesn’t mean you are spending your days with your hand out searching for people to help you. It doesn’t mean that you are expecting to receive help or gifts either. You are worthy to receive the help in whatever form it comes to you. Just remember to say, “Thank you!”